It wasn’t easy, as we both came with a lot of emotional baggage, but our new parents worked extremely hard to ensure that we spoke about our past and were a very open family with the best chance in life we could have. We met them a few times and eventually began to spend weekends and weeks with them.Įventually we moved in with them, and their two cats. When you have been passed around a lot as a child, you just think it’s another move into another home. I remember not really understanding what that meant. Some were good, healthy places and others were the type that you read about in the papers today.
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We continued to move through various foster parents and children’s homes. This was the last we saw of her, and I remember the pain and tears of being torn away. Very little explanation was given, but we had one hour with her to play and take photos.Īfter this time, they literally took us away and at that age, it was hard to understand why you are not allowed to see your mother again. Social services eventually decided to split us up but thankfully, this decision did not result in us losing each other.ĭuring this period, we still had supervised visits to my mother and by the age of about four or five, she had fallen pregnant again with my sister.ĭuring one of these visits, we were taken into a room before meeting our mum and told that this would be the final time we would see her. We were moved into a variety of foster homes, all with the hope that we may be eventually adopted into a new family.īecause we were two boys, it became difficult to find us adoptive parents who wanted two children. This all occurred within the first three years of my life. It was decided that she could not cope and my brother and I were taken into foster care. But the relationship broke down and I moved with my mother to London, where she became pregnant with my brother.īy this point, she was struggling to cope and had developed a strong drug and alcohol addiction, which at times, put my brother and I in dangerous situations. It’s wonderful how all our gay activists over the years have fought the good fight and won so much for all of us and future generations of gays.My mother was around 17 when I was born in Glasgow in 1982 and my father was roughly the same age.įor the first year of my life, we lived as a family. I knew a guy who once told me that he only could feel alive in summer on fire Islan, the rest of the year in upstate New York where he was a teacher, he had no social life, no outwardly gay experiences or appearances. So as you smugly criticize these guys in the film, I urge other viewers to try to place yourselves in their shoes, and imagine what gay life was in 1976. mere suspicion of being gay, or even unmarried beyond a certain undefined age, could be grounds for loosing government jobs, and of course, no security clearances for gays. These Fire Island frolicers were all born during the gay bashing and gay witch hunts of the lavender scare, under Sen Joe McCarthy and NY asshole closet case lawyer Roy Cohen. The military was weeding out gays left and right.
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Gay marriage was not even on the radar screen yet. If a pair did become known in the non-gay world, your partner was known as your “friend” or your “roommate”. It was the era of “couples” always having separate apartments, not talking about the other at work or school, or among straight friends. Society didn’t like it, families raised eyebrows. In those days, many guys wee gay on weekends, straight acting Monday through Friday. Society was very anti-gay, the gay community had lots of internalized homophobia, and whenever and wherever pockets of freedom existed, of course there were excesses that cover compensated for what most of their lives were previously, and for the majority, off of Fire Island. They did not get to have boy friends in junior high (now called middle school), high school, any many even in college. Aren’t you prissy and sanctimonious? In 1976, most visitors to Fire Island had never known the freedom and self-acceptance of living “openly gay”, “Out”, in their daily lives wherever they originally came from.